Alice's Restaurant Karaoke Arlo Guthrie

Karaoke Alice's Restaurant Arlo Guthrie

18:11
In the same key as the original: D

Play the karaoke of Alice's Restaurant

Lyrics of Alice's Restaurant

This song is called
Alice's Restaurant and it's 'bout Alice
And the restaurant
But Alice's restaurant is not the name of the restaurant
That's just the name of the song
That's why I called the song
Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago
Was on two years ago on Thanksgiving when my friend and I
Went up to visit Alice at the restaurant but
Alice doesn't live in the restaurant she lives in the church nearby
The restaurant in the bell-tower with her husband Ray and
Fasha the dog and livin' in the bell tower like that they got a lot
Of room downstairs where the pews used to be and
Havin' all that room seein' as how they took out all the pews
They decided that they didn't have to take out their garbage for a long time
We got up there
We found all the garbage in there and we decided it'd be a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage down
To the city dump
So we took the half a ton of garbage put it in the back of a red VW microbus
Took shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and
Headed on toward the city dump
Well we got there and there was a big sign and a chain across the dump saying
"closed on Thanksgiving"
We had never heard of a dump closed on Thanksgiving before and with tears in our eyes we drove off into the sunset looking for a
Another place to put the garbage
We didn't find one
'Till we came to a side road and off the side of the side road there was another fifteen foot cliff and
At the bottom of the cliff there was another pile of garbage and we decided that one big pile is better than two little piles and
Rather than bring that one up we decided to throw ours down
That's what we did
Drove back to the church had a Thanksgiving dinner
That couldn't be beat went to sleep and didn't get up until the next morning when we got a phone call from officer Obie
He said kid we found your name on an envelope at the bottom of ab' a half a ton of garbage and
Just wanted to know if you had any information about it
And I said yes Sir officer Obie cannot tell a lie
I put that envelope under that garbage
After speaking to him for about forty-five minutes on the telephone we finally arrived at the truth of the matter and said
We had to go down and pick up the garbage and
And also had to go down and speak to him at the police officer's station
So we got in the red
VW microbus with the shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on
Toward the police officer's station
Now friends, there was only one or two things that Obie coulda done
At the police station and the first was that he coulda given us a medal for being so brave and honest on the telephone
Which wasn't very likely we didn't expect it
And the other thing was that he coulda bawled us out and told us never
To be see driving garbage around the vicinity again
Which is what we expected but when we got to the police officer's station
There was a third possibility that we hadn't even counted upon and we was both immediately arrested
Handcuffed and I said Obie
I don't think I can pick up the garbage with these handcuffs on
He said shut up kid
Get in the back of the patrol car
And that's what we did we sat in the back of the patrol car and drove
To the quote "Scene of the Crime" unquote
I want tell you about the town of
Stockbridge Massachusetts
Where this happened here
They got three stop signs
Two police officers and one police car but when we got to the "Scene of the Crime"
There was five police officers and three police cars
Being the biggest crime of the last fifty years and everybody wanted to get in
The newspaper story about it and they was using up all kinds of cop equipment that they had hangin' around
The police officer's station
They was taking plaster tire tracks foot prints dog smelling prints
They took twenty seven
Eight-by-ten color glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining
What each one was to be used as evidence against us
Took pictures of the approach the getaway
The northwest corner the southwest corner
And that's not to mention the aerial photography
After the ordeal we went back to the jail
Obie said he was gonna put us in the cell said kid I'm gonna
Put you in the cell
I want your wallet and your belt
And I said Obie
I can understand you
Wanting my wallet so I don't have any money to spend in the cell but what do you want my belt for?
And he said kid we don't want any hangings
I said Obie did you think I was gonna hang myself for litterin'?
Obie said he was making sure and friends Obie was 'cos he took out the toilet seat so I couldn't hit myself
Over the head and drown
And he took out the toilet paper so
I couldn't bend the bars roll out
The roll the toilet paper out the window
Slide down the roll and have an escape
Obie was making sure
And it was about four or five hours later that Alice
Remember Alice?
It's a song about Alice
Alice came by and with a few nasty words to Obie on the side bailed us out of jail and we went back to the church had another Thanksgiving
Dinner that couldn't be beat and we didn't get up until the next morning when we all had to go to court
We walked in, sat down
Obie came in with the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph
On the back of each one sat down
Man came in said all rise we all stood up and
Obie stood up with
The twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures and the judge walked in sat down with a seeing eye dog and he sat down, we sat down
Obie looked at the seeing eye dog
And then at the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with the circles
And arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one
And looked at the seeing eye dog
And then at the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back
Of each one and began to cry 'cos Obie came to the realization that it was a typical case of american blind justice
And there wasn't nothing he could do about it
And the judge wasn't going to look at the twenty seven eight-by-ten color
Glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was to be used
As evidence against us
We was fined
Fifty dollars and had to pick up the garbage in the snow but
That's not what I came to tell you about
Came to talk about the draft
They got a building down in New York City
It's called Whitehall Street where you walk in you get injected
Inspected detected infected neglected and selected
I went down to get my physical examination one day and I walked in
I sat down, got good and drunk the night before
So I looked and felt my best when I went in that morning
'Cos I wanted to look like the all-American kid from
New York City
Man I wanted, I wanted to feel like the all
I wanted to be the all-American kid from
New York and I walked in
Sat down I was hung down brung down hung up and all kinds o' mean nasty ugly things and I waked in and sat down and they
Gave me a piece of paper said kid
See the psychiatrist room six O four and I
I went up there
I said shrink
I want to kill
I mean I wanna I wanna kill kill, I wanna I wanna see
I wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth eat dead burnt bodies
I mean kill
Kill, kill, kill
And I started jumpin' up and down yelling kill, kill
And he started jumpin' up and down with me
And we was both jumpin' up and down yelling kill, kill
And the Sargent came over pinned a medal on me sent me down the hall
Said you're our boy
Didn't feel too good about it
Proceeded on down the hall gettin' more injections inspections detections
Neglections and all kinds of stuff that they as doin' to me at the thing there and I was there for two hours
Three hours, four hours
I was there for a long time going through all kinds of mean nasty ugly things
And I was just having a tough time there and they was inspecting injecting every single part of me and they
Was leaving no part untouched
Proceeded through when I when I finally came to see the very last man I walked in walked in sat down after
A whole big thing there and I walked up and said what do you want?
He said kid we only got one question
Have you ever been arrested?
And I proceeded to tell him the story of the Alice's
Restaurant Massacre with full orchestration and five part harmony
And stuff like that and all the phenome and he stopped me right there and said kid
Did you ever go to court?
And I proceeded to tell him the story of the twenty seven eight-by-ten color glossy pictures with the circles and arrows
And the paragraph on the back of each one
And he stopped me right there and said kid
I want you to go and sit down on that bench that says Group W now kid
And I I walked over to the to the bench there and there is is group W's where where they put you if you may not be moral enough
To, to join the army after committin' your special crime and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
Looking people on the bench there and there's mother rapers father stabbers father rapers
Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me and one they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible
Crime-type guys sitting there on the bench
And the meanest ugliest nastiest one the meanest father raper
Of them all was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly 'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things
And he sat down next to me and said kid
Whad'ya get?
I said I didn't get nothing
I had to pay fifty dollars and pick up the garbage
He said what were you arrested for kid?
And I said litterin' and they all moved away from me on the bench there and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean
Nasty things 'till I said and creating a nuisance
And they all came back shook my hand and we had a great time
On the bench talkin' about crime mother stabbing father raping all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about
On the bench and everything was fine
We was smokin' cigarettes and all kinds of things until the Sargent came over
Had some paper in his hand held it up and said kids
This piece of paper's got forty seven words thirty-seven sentences
Fifty-eight words we wanna know details of the crime time of the crime and any other kind of thing you gotta say pertaining to and about
The crime I want to know arresting officer's name and any other kind of thing you gotta say and talked for forty-five minutes
And nobody understood a word that he said but we had fun filling out the forms and playing with the pencils on the bench there
And I filled out the massacre with the four part harmony and
Wrote it down there just like it was and everything was fine and I
Put down the pencil and I turned over the piece of paper and there then on the other side
In the middle of the other side
Away from everything else on the other side
In parentheses
Capital letters
Quotated
Read the following words
Kid
Have you rehabilitated yourself?
I went over to the Sargent said Sargent you got a
Lot a damn gall to ask me if I've rehabilitated myself
I mean
I mean, I mean that just
I'm sittin' here on the bench
I mean I'm sittin' here on the Group W bench
'Cos you want to know if
I'm moral enough to join the
Army burn women kids houses and villages after bein' a litterbug, mmm?
He looked at me and said kid we don't like your kind
And we're gonna send you fingerprints off to Washington and friends
Somewhere in Washington enshrined in
Some little folder is a study in black and white of my fingerprints and the only reason I'm singing you this song now
Is 'cos you may know somebody in a similar situation
Or you may be in a similar situation and if your in a situation like that
There's only one thing you can do and that's walk into the shrink wherever you are just walk in say shrink
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant and walk out
You know if one person just one person does it they may think he's really sick and they won't take him
And if two people two people do it in harmony
They may think they're both faggots and
They won't take either of them
And if three people do it
Three can you imagine three people walking in singin' a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walking out, they may think it's an organization
And can you, can you imagine fifty people a day
I said fifty people a day walking in singin' a bar of Alice's Restaurant
And walking out and friends they may think it's a movement
And that's what it is
The Alice's Restaurant
Anti-Massacree movement and all you got to do to join is to sing it the next time it come's around on the guitar with feeling
So we'll wait for it to come around on the guitar here and sing it when it does
Here it comes
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
That was horrible
If you want to end war and stuff you got to sing loud
You can put it loud
I've been singing this song now for twenty five minutes and
I could sing it for another twenty five minutes
I'm not proud or tired
So we'll wait 'till it comes around again and
This time with four part harmony and feeling
We're just waitin' for it to come around that's what we're doing
All right now
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant excepting Alice
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
I said walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant
Da-da da-da da-da da-dum at Alice's Restaurant

Any reproduction is prohibited

Show the lyrics Report lyrics error

Report lyrics error

Send Cancel

Discuss Alice's Restaurant

Log in to leave a reply.